5 Reasons I Don't Like Big Bang Theory

I've often had a love-hate relationship with the show The Big Bang Theory. At first I thought it was great, because it touched on issues that aren't normally brought up in a sit-com (like whether teleportation à la Star Trek could work). I will admit that it's funny, but it also has huge flaws that sometimes prevent me from being able to enjoy it.

1. Bad Behavior is OK, If Leonard Does It.

Oh, Leonard. I wanted to be able to like you, I really did. I mean, you are the obvious hero of the show, right? Destined to get into Penny's panties instead of anyone else, because you're the main character. Always right in an argument, even when you shouldn't be, because you're the main character.

Hey, I get it. I've tolerated lots of douche-ish behavior from main characters before. Harry Potter's father, James, was a bully. In My Little Pony, Twilight Sparkle sometimes seems paranoid, alarmist, and obsessive, and would be so if the plot didn't usually prove to the audience that her hunches were right (like when she accused Cadence of being evil, for example). But when Leonard can get away with things like lying to a long-time friend about Penny just to sabotage the friend's chances with her, or, idk, jeopardizing another long-time friend's entire research career just because you found him a little annoying as a traveling companion? That's a little harder to swallow. I also hate how Leonard is the designated love interest for Penny, when she has greater chemistry with Sheldon, and seems to understand him better than, and have more patience in dealing with him, than anyone else does.

Furthermore, Leonard's personality is not that good. He's whiny, and always focused on himself, even when his friends are having real problems and his are relatively minor. He also whines way, way too much about not getting laid. He also admits in one episode that his entire relationship with Penny was at one time all founded on lie after lie after lie; he admitted to pretending to like things she liked to do, and generally enjoy her company, solely as a deception to get in her cooch. I feel that a relationship should be based on honest communication and a real understanding of each other as well as a real mutuality of beliefs, values, and interests. Even if you don't like the same things as your significant other, you still owe them to be honest about it. For example, I never give my boyfriend the impression that I like baseball, and he never pretended to like anime. Why should the audience of the show be sold on one hand the idea that the Penny/Leonard ship is seaworthy, even romantic or cute, and on the other hand be told that the times they were together almost everything Leonard said to her was a lie so he could have sex with her? I mean, if all that matters to Leonard is sex, why doesn't he just rent it.

That also brings me to my next point about the show.

2. The Entire Show Is Way Too Smutty to be Geeky

It's probably because of the pun of the show, but why does every plot of the show have to revolve around sex? The show is just as smutty as say, 2 And a Half Men, but dressed up with occasional references to Star Trek, comic books, gaming, and physics.

I don't have a problem with the idea of sex, or even sex being shown or extensively discussed in entertainment, but when the sexual content of the show becomes the focus of a show that pretends to be more clever than that, I kind of get mad. I think it's because Big Bang Theory is a rather pretentious show that tries to stand out as different than the traditional sitcom by showing a different sort of people than would ordinarily be featured in one. (This has been done better, by the way, in the brilliant geeky office comedy from England, I.T. Crowd) However, Big Bang Theory fails because they fail to accurately understand the people they're trying to portray.

Every character is defined by their relationship with sex and little else. Howard is the failed, miserable, playboy, defined as not getting any (until he hooks up with Bernadette). Raj is the failed, miserable shy man who can't talk to women without alcohol or drugs. Leonard is a miserable failure because he chases after an unattainably hot girl who, as I've said before, has absolutely no mutual interests with him on which to base a good relationship. Only Sheldon and Amy are interesting then, because they are asexual and as such get to be fully-formed human beings defined by more than their reason for their lack (but they still are). In this world, the writers oversimplified what it means to be a geek; they boiled it down to meaning "unlucky with women" and also to mean someone who bitches about this problem nonstop.

Many geeky men do have trouble getting dates. And some of them like to joke about how unlikely it seems for them to get any. However, most of the truly smart people I know out there not only 1) develop the confidence to ask women out eventually, even if they didn't have it on a level with their peers in high school 2) are more respectful to women in general, which many women like, and 3) (And this is an important point) HAVE THINGS THEY CARE ABOUT OTHER THAN SEX!

I mean, do you think Einstein would have been Einstein if he had spent all his time pacing around wondering if a certain girl liked him? What do you think the people who made ground-breaking scientific discoveries cared more about 1) Their research, or 2) how many times they could get women to talk to them? They do this in other things, like A Beautiful Mind, where Nash helps some buddies in a bar get laid using math. However, it's obvious at least there that the math was the primary fixation of Nash's mind, and that getting his friends some lady companions for the night was just a one-time bonus. But in Big Bang, every character seems exhaustively obsessed with their sex life, and little else. Howard rarely talks about engineering, Bernadette about biology, etc. And, for me, the academic stuff is actually what I'd find more interesting, shockingly enough, there are people like that out there. Think about it, we're a primate, there are 7 billion + of us on this planet, sex has been around for as long as we have. It isn't new, or interesting, by itself. What is interesting is anthropology, physics, technology, science fiction, biology, etc. Geeks primarily live their lives in the world of information, but the show assumes we all think like extroverts, focusing primarily on interactions with and competition between others. We don't, for the most part, think that way, and I wish the show would recognize that we actually are people who like the geeky stuff we're doing and aren't sitting in an armchair somewhere brooding over how miserably lonely and dateless we are. I imagine that an extrovert who had to endure our frequency of human contact or sex might go insane, but we aren't extroverts and for us, what is valued is quality human contact, not quantity. We also prefer to focus on ideas and information than on other people and our relationships to them.

For this issue, I would recommend that the writers of the show turn their attention to books written about the experience of being an introvert. My favorite would be Introvert Power by Laurie Helgoe.

3. Penny Is An Annoying Character

Oh yeah, if there's one thing us geek girls love, it's annoying, slutty non-geek girls trying to fake it so they can end up with a guy who isn't a dishwasher. Especially if they're mean, catty, stuck-up, egocentric, prance around in hardly any clothing, and have grating, high-pitched pep-squad voices. (I also personally have a vendetta against anyone who calls people "sweetie" who aren't their significant other. I find it creepy at best, condescending at worst.)

In one episode, Penny nonchalantly admits that she was a bully who did terrible things to another girl in high school. Bullying is not acceptable, and ties into what I said about this show being infuriating in it's case of "designated hero" syndrome. Penny is there to be a love interest for Leonard, and to show T and A to the audience as often as possible, and to be the surrogate for the non-geek audience members who "don't get it". But they don't try very hard to make her a likable character, or a good female role model. In fact, if I had to describe her in one word, it would be "bratty". In two, "bratty and obnoxious". In three, "bratty, obnoxious, slutbag".

She's not just a terrible excuse for a human being, but not even good for what the writers intended her to be, which is Leonard's designated love interest. She doesn't show any signs of sharing any of Leonard's interests, and he doesn't share any of hers. When they hook up one time it was because she was drunk. They don't really seem to have any chemistry or any reason to be together other than that the plot of the show demands it. It's very forced-feeling, which can be downright painful to watch.

Also, when I first started watching the show I thought that in terms of feminist/gender egalitarian principles, it was in the stone age. The only female character, and she's an almost-naked bimbo. Why can't these guys find girls of equal or greater intelligence, I wondered. Does Hollywood still think men are "threatened" by smart women? I'm glad that they fixed this problem with the show by introducing other good female characters such as Priya, Amy, Bernadette, Leonard's mother Beverly, and Leslie Winkle. All of these characters contribute to mending what was originally a lack of good female characters in the show. However, despite all of the characters I've mentioned being more of interest to me than Penny is, Penny still gets the most screen time, greatest number of lines, and is the focus of the show's main romantic tension. This kind of grates on my nerves after a while.

4. The Unrealistic Treatment of Mental Illness (especially with Sheldon)

Quick, what DSM-listed disorder does Sheldon Cooper have? The answer: Which ones could we rule out? He seems to have a little of everything, from OCD to ADHD to autism/Asperger's Syndrome. Just for fun, they threw in some occasional spurts of delusion, paranoia, and anxiety. And yet, unlike a real special-needs person, Sheldon's issues aren't given much consideration by others and he's bullied for being mentally ill, rather than getting any sort of medical or therapeutic help. For a show set in modern times, with characters who believe in the scientific approach to most problems, it seems ridiculous that Sheldon doesn't have a therapist, and equally ridiculous that Leonard doesn't have one for his self-esteem and horrifying mommy issues, Raj for his social anxiety, or Howard for his problems with his mother and women.

In one episode, Raj takes an experimental social anxiety pill to talk to women, but can't deal with the side-effects. Do the writers realize that there are perfectly safe anti-anxiety meds available out there? It seems baffling that he never researched treatment options for this problem, as they do exist and would have been available to him. It seems like a little much for a plot to demand that I imagine a true geek whose initial response to some kind of social problem isn't to either ignore it, as I've said we have other interests, or to try to fix it in the most proven, scientific way available to us.

But the show doesn't exist without each character possessing certain quirks, as it were. And then the main problem of the show becomes that these quirks are, for one, exaggerated beyond realism, and also fixable psychological issues that aren't treated like medical conditions like they would be by the characters if they were real. (And, they would probably also know better than to use incorrect terms like "pathological shyness" for social anxiety!)
I just feel that if a show does not have a premise that's believable, it's not a good show. I have seen the "There Are No Therapists" trope in other works pulled off successfully, but I don't think it can be pulled off in this show.

For example, I think the anime series Neon Genesis Evangelion was able to make it seem plausible that the mentally scarred teenagers didn't get psychological help for their myriad issues. First of all, their psychological states were deftly being manipulated by scientists for the purpose of making them pilot and fight well. Second, I find that teenagers are often reluctant to open up to adults about their psychological weaknesses, because they like to give an outward impression of being strong, and they can also be mistrustful of parents and other authority figures. Considering that many parents and authority figures in Evangelion were abusive, lying, untrustworthy, or uncaring, it's obvious why none of them thought to seek out the kind of help an ordinary person might if feeling depressed or unmotivated.

5. The Show Still Makes Geek Culture Seem Abnormal

To me, this is most apparent in the bits that feature Amy Farrah Fowler. Unlike Penny or Bernadette, bubbly blondes (again with Hollywood and hair-color-based stereotypes, yay), she is what I would call authentically geeky. However, the show presents the audience with a wildly exaggerated version of the female geek. She is an alien, inscrutable, incomprehensible. Almost every word she gets out gets drowned out with the cued laughter. She is something to be feared and ridiculed at first, and eventually warmed up to where she can be "fixed" with a make-over or by spending time with other women socializing and learning to better fit the mold of cultural gender conventions. Of course I find this treatment of female geekery unacceptable and demeaning. Why can't Amy be accepted for who she is, and why is it that they had to make her so cuckoo in the first place?

That isn't the only problem. Every joke in the show is aimed at people like me, and every joke in the show can be re-imagined as being directed at us hatefully by a bully on the playground or a snooty preppy kid in high school. This show seems to paint itself as a show about geek acceptance, but it makes fun of everything that makes us special without taking much time to defend our right to be who we are and enjoy what we enjoy. I feel like this show is always telling me how weird and different I am, how wrong and unusual I am, and how normal people are Penny and if I can't be Penny (or date her) I'm a loser. I'm nobody. And when people have been telling me those things since kindergarten, I don't feel the need to participate voluntarily in what is, for me, a public shaming and bullying re-enactment.


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RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 3 years ago from Illinois Author

Another article from someone who feels as I do that this show is not just harsh to geeky guys but also to geeky girls.

Joe O 3 years ago

Hah, nice write up, I basically agree with everything you said. I wish I could like Big Bang Theory for a lot of the fun stuff it does include, but this is just too irritating to bear. These are the kinds of things I notice subconsciously when I watch most movies or TV shows, but normally I don't know how to explain that using words. For this reason I feel like I'm wasting my time trying out any movie or TV show. I stick to music and the internet.

thebiologyofleah profile image

thebiologyofleah 3 years ago from Massachusetts

Wow- this is a great article detailing some of the points that I have thought myself while watching Big Bang Theory and others that hadn't occurred to me but that you are 100% correct on.

I hate the Penny-Leonard relationship, they make no sense together. Not because one is too good for the other but because they have absolutely nothing in common. And yes I like the actress Kaley Cuoco but I agree, the character Penny is pretty terrible.

Your point about them all being obsessed with sex is dead on and absolutely there is so much more to geeks than being sad the pretty, popular people don't want to hang out with (and/or sleep with) us.

I could go on, but I will say great article, voted up and sharing.

GoForTheJuggler profile image

GoForTheJuggler 3 years ago from Texas

To be honest, I watch the show primarily for the "geeky" pop culture references, Will Wheaton, and Penny's delicious cleavage. Sheldon's antics are generally hilarious, the addition ofAmy to the cast was much needed and perfect, and Raj and Howard's exchanges are usually spot on, despite their terrible character traits. Oh yeah, Howard's mother cracks me up, too. The key is not to take it too seriously, because it's a formulaic, stylized version of reality.

@Joe - you've got to stop watching network TV (and sitcoms at that) if you want to find a TV show worth watching. There are plenty of television masterpieces out there worth viewing... if you need a list, let me know.

Stevennix2001 profile image

Stevennix2001 3 years ago

I agree with most of what "goforthejuggler" has said, except for the part about penny's cleavage. Don't get me wrong, I like looking at a pretty girl as much as the next guy, or girl (not that there's anything wrong with it), but I would never watch a show just to look at a girl's cleavage. Besides if i wanted to watch something just for how sexy a girl looks, then i'd rather just go off and watch porn or something. Not that i have, but just saying. lol :P

In all seriousness though, I never take a lot of tv sitcoms that seriously because it's mostly played up for laughs. and unless your watching a comedy show that's meant to be witty like "arrested development" for example, the reality is most tv sitcoms often fall back on a formulaic approach to keep their audiences hooked with something familiar; while subtly introducing new things along the way to spice things up. almost all sitcoms go by the formulaic rule if you watch them closely.

Take something like "Full House" for example. That show had three single guys raising 3 little girls in san francisco. They all have stereotypical personalities. One of the girls whines about some issue, and in the end it's always resolved with some touchy feely rushed moment to create AW moments.

Or what about "Everyone Loves Raymond." That show revolves around the concept that it seems like almost everyone hates raymond half the time, which makes the title of the show ironic.

Or what about home improvement. Tim acts stupid on his show, "Tool Time." At home, he acts even more stupid, and screws things up. He gets advice from his neighbor, but tim screws up the advice, yet somehow he's forgiven anyway.

The reality is "Big Bang theory" is not that much different from the other shows i just mentioned. It's a successful sitcom because it relies on formulaic traits to make it familiar with audiences to enjoy, while still implementing subtle hints of changes to add drama. Although from reading your hub, it seems like you enjoy shows that aren't formulaic, and often think outside the box.

There's nothing wrong with that, but sadly in america, tv comedies have to be formulaic most of the time because audiences don't respond well to change. It's like fry said in "Futurama." People don't watch tv to see change. They watch it because it's safe and feels familiar, which is why you don't see too many tv shows try something new.

Not saying that all shows are like this, as im sure there are a few exceptions, but when it comes to most successful tv sitcoms, this is often the case. Hell, even legendary shows like "cheers", "seinfeld", "Friends" and "I love Lucy" fell into the same formulaic trap, yet those shows are deemed some of the most successful tv sitcoms of all time.

FatFreddysCat profile image

FatFreddysCat 3 years ago from The Garden State

Kaley "Penny" Cuoco is cute. She's the main reason I tune into "BBT" every once in a while. I can take or leave the rest of the characters.

GoForTheJuggler profile image

GoForTheJuggler 3 years ago from Texas

Fun Fact: Kaley Cuoco was on 8 Simple Rules For Dating My Teenage Daughter, before John Ritter passed away. I wasn't sure if I'd ever see her on TV again, so thanks for that BBT!

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 3 years ago from Illinois Author

Thanks for the comments. Yes, I agree that you shouldn't take sitcoms so seriously, but then again, I look for more serious and intelligent entertainment and I am able to find things I like in other shows and not so much in BBT.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 2 years ago from Illinois Author

What a nice comment. You know, I'd love to read your articles because I'm sure that you have a lot of great things to say, oh, wait, you're not a Hubpages user, but another juvenile commenter hiding with the anonymity of the internet.

Oh well. Anyway, I think everyone other than "unknown" there makes some really good points about BBT. I guess all sitcoms rely on some kind of formula and stereotypes, and that's why I usually don't watch them.

But the point about BBT I guess is that it appears to be something different, like you expect it to be more evolved than a garden-variety sitcom, but it is just a garden-variety sitcom, albeit one aimed at a more educated demographic.

Anate profile image

Anate 2 years ago

I thought this was an excellent article on the show.

Robert Sacchi profile image

Robert Sacchi 21 months ago

Thank you. You bring up many valid points. If a TV series is going to revolve around a type of people it should seem the writers know something about that type of people not just a comic book version of them.

Cardia profile image

Cardia 17 months ago from Barbados.

While reading this, I found myself agreeing on many points that you made, especially that of Penny's character. Sometimes she's just not plain likeable. And also the point you included about how much the show focuses on sex has for something that is supposedly about geek culture and sciences.

I do still watch the show dedicatedly, but it's becoming a little tired now.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 17 months ago from Illinois Author

At least later on they expand their repertoire of stereotypes, but the show relies too heavily on them. (Indian, redneck Christian, Jewish, unlovable uptight atheist in Leonard's mom, etc.) Also, I can't stand laugh tracks. It's insulting to me and I hate myself for reflexively laughing at something I don't think is funny just to be going along with the laugh track. :/

greeneyedblondie profile image

greeneyedblondie 16 months ago

Actually the show is done in front of a live audience...

If you watch the first season and two of the show all of the characters were just weird and normal geeks. They changed writers and directors too I believe and changed it to go from regular scientific geeks that were weird to borderline autistic, inapropiate weirdos that can be classified as creeps with some of things they do. Too bad.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 16 months ago from Illinois Author

Well, idk, it sounded fake to me. Someone said this on Yahoo! Answers on the subject and I think it's probably right, kind of a mix of the two:

"They record the audience laughter during taping.

But then in the editing process they use that recorded laughter to build a laugh track...

It's called sweetening."

You can tell that at least some of the laughter is pre-recorded because it sounds the same each time. It may be that it was live at one point, but they've changed in recent episodes.

About your other point, I don't think the characters have derailed all that much, and some have developed. I also like that the show has added more of a variety of characters.

swalia profile image

swalia 9 months ago

To be honest, I love Big Bang Theory. One can't really expect comedy shows to make sense.

Michelle 8 months ago

Thank for this, sincerely. You've expertly expressed my main problems with the show as a fellow female geek. The portrayal of women in that show is appalling. There's one woman who closely represents female geeks (Amy) and she's judgemental, inappropriate and obsessed with sex. Even the women "geeks" in that show bash geek culture and are presented as being the superior, mature ones. FYI, BBT writers, failing to accept harmless and diverse interests isn't mature.

And why is it that when you see a girl in a comic book store on that show, it's not because they just like comic books? They have to be there for artistic reasons (artists or screenwriters for children) or because duder dragged them there. Get with the times. They vaguely mention that Stuart chases girls away, which makes the whole portrayal of comic book culture even more insulting. Makes it look like comic book shops aren't safe for women. The ones in my area are fine.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 8 months ago from Illinois Author

" FYI, BBT writers, failing to accept harmless and diverse interests isn't mature." Yeah, they try to get a lot of mileage out of geek-bashing for a show that presents itself as appealing to geeks.

Cat 7 months ago

You like to listen to yours of talk don't you...?

Jean Bakula profile image

Jean Bakula 7 months ago from New Jersey

It's pretty obvious Sheldon's character is asexual. Why did the writer's have to mess with that? He and Amy could have had a strong friendship, or they could have honestly discussed Sheldon's orientation. While I am a straight woman, I know asexual people who were really disappointed when the show took the easy way out and let Sheldon and Amy have sex, when he obviously didn't feel a need for it in his life. He was a kind of "Hero" to the community, the first to "come out" in a TV show. But I guess the network was obsessed with ratings, and you can't get them if everybody isn't having sex with someone, even someone who doesn't want it.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 7 months ago from Illinois Author

Yeah I know, I also think that was pretty bogus, and kind of a slap in the face to all the asexual fans. :/

Jean Bakula profile image

Jean Bakula 7 months ago from New Jersey

And I think Amy and Sheldon actually have the most in common too. They like a lot of the same things. It's a shame that it took that direction, the show has potential to champion people who are different for whatever reason, but I guess all they care about is money and ratings. You wrote a great hub though.

RachaelLefler profile image

RachaelLefler 7 months ago from Illinois Author

Thanks! I wrote this a long time ago and haven't thought much about this topic since, but I am a bit annoyed at how popular the show is, because like you said they only make whatever creative decisions will increase viewership and sell merchandise.

Thomas 5 months ago

Very well written article. Spot on. Thank you.

Darryl 7 weeks ago

This show has been on x-number of years now, and I can't believe there has never been a episode where someone beats the hell out of Sheldon. It is because of his antics that we have stopped watching, and only watch when nothing else is on. How can a writer keep such annoying feelings like he does.

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