'Unfriended' - A Horror Movie Review
I'd like to make sure that we're all on the same page before you read on.
This review contains my personal opinion on the movie Unfriended. If you like it, great! If you dislike it, great!
Just wanted to be clear about this from the get-go.
Also, this review contains MAJOR SPOILERS. Consider yourselves warned.
Overview Of Unfriended
Unfriended, an American supernatural horror movie, was released in 2014 and is an absolute mess (according to myself anyway).
I want to make it very clear already that I dislike this movie to the extreme. Why I do will be covered in a bit.
Unfriended, unlike a lot of modern horror movies, takes a sort of turn from the very start of the movie. The entire story is unfolded from the view of a computer screen. That's right, the entire movie is basically Team Viewer: The Movie, except you don't get to mess around with their computer.
This is not necessarily a bad thing and I actually want to give the movie a bit of credit for this. Trust me, it's the only time I'll ever do that.
With the basics covered, I'll move onto the plot of this wonderful movie.
The Plot Of Unfriended
Alright, this is actually quite simple to explain.
A bunch of teenagers harasses and eventually drive a girl they know to suicide. Being the assholes they are, they continue about their merry lives until one day, in a group Skype call (on the anniversary of her death, of course), an unknown user with no profile picture joins their video call.
They soon find out that it is, in fact, the ghost of the girl they drove to an early death and she is content on getting revenge. It starts out with just fun and games but quickly turns into people getting "murdered". I'm not sure if I'd call it murder yet, though, as one of them just stares at a screen and another one gets his hand stuck in a blender.
After failing to inform any kind of authorities and their attempt at removing a virus (by emptying their recycle bins) is a failure as well, they are played against each other as the ghost of the girl (whom I just remembered is called Laura) reveals secrets about them and their more intimate lives (cheating on their partners and such).
Lastly, after denying it for the entire duration of the movie, we, as the viewer, and the rest of the characters find out that the girl whose laptop we've been watching (Blaire) was actually the one recording the video footage that started the harassment of Laura. The movie ends with her screen being shut by the supernatural forces of GHOSTS and a scary Laura pops up for a final jump scare.
The Plot Thickens (Not Really)
What can we conclude from my little walkthrough of the story, you may ask? I'll tell you!
The characters in the movie are terrible goddamn people. They are the stereotypical obnoxious assholes that most modern horror now portrays, sadly. Not a single one of them is likable at all and their lines just seem so out of place and poorly written.
Now, the actors themselves do a decent job. Their performance isn't terrible but you're too busy hating who they're pretending to be to actually notice that.
Allow me to quote one of the characters this once, just because I equally love and despise this line: "There's fucking no one here. I'm gonna go check it out".
That line is so brilliantly ignorant that I can't help but remember it, even after all of this time.
Seriously, the scariest part about this movie is how accurately it represents the quality of a Skype video call.— Bennett Sloan
Unfriended Ruined Itself
Unfriended took a cool and mostly unused concept (I say mostly since it's been done before but not to the same extent as other things) by recording a screen and the interactions made on it. However, they ruined their own greatness before it even had a chance to exist by stumbling into the same mistakes that every other horror movies make.
If you want your viewer to truly be horrified when something happens to a character, they need to feel something other than a pure annoyance when they're on screen. You need something different than the old "oh, we're teens and we're assholes and we have no idea what we're doing".
I realize that a lot of people enjoy this movie. Honestly, I'm happy for you since you didn't feel the same pain in the back of your head as I did when watching it. I've watched a lot of horror movies and I like, almost, exactly none of them. My expectations are high, but all I ever strive for is some degree of originality which Unfriended, sadly, fails to provide.
Last Thoughts Before Unfriending
(I apologize for the joke...)
I'll be honest and say that I truly despise Unfriended. I hate its use of nonsensical tech-related scenes, its plot, its characters, everything.
I feel like we're slowly moving towards a future where the majority of movie-goers want this kind of repetitive bullshit, and therefore, that's what will be produced.
When I sit down and spend 83 minutes (yes, its actual run time) of my life watching something, I want to feel something different than a sense of anger. I want something that makes me think, not loud jumpy scenes or petty conflicts between unlikable fictional beings.
I might be unreasonable. I do realize this, but I will continue searching for something good and until I find it, I have a feeling I'll return here with more reviews.
Unfriended. Remember kids, this is why we use Discord nowadays!
Your opinion matters!
Before you go, I'm curious as to whether you've watched this movie or plan to and if you have, did you enjoy it?
© 2019 Bennett Sloan