Ten Reasons To Drool Over Jensen Ackles
Jensen Ackles, how do we love thee, let us count the ways....
Ahem. Okay, we're not actually crazy, and we have no intention of rewriting a perfectly good poem in his honor. We'll leave that to his wife.
We are, however, definitely ... appreciative. (Yeah, that's the best word for it.) So, here's a tongue-in-cheek look at some of the things we appreciate most about Jensen Ross Ackles.
A Quick Lesson in Who-the-Heck-Is-This-Guy? For Those Who Aren't Sure
Jensen is currently best known as one of the stars of the CW's cult hit Supernatural, where he plays Dean, the elder of the two ghost-busting Winchester brothers.
He has also had recurring roles as Eric Brady on Days of Our Lives, Alec (X5-494) on Dark Angel, C.J. on Dawson's Creek, and Jason Teague on Smallville, as well as a few mostly forgettable films, of which the most interesting is probably the Marilyn Monroe bio-pic Blonde, partly because it involves Jensen dancing in a kimono and having a drunken threesome with "Marilyn" and "Cass," aka Grey's Anatomy's Patrick "McDreamy" Dempsey. (Ah, crossover bliss. Now if only we can get Jensen on screen with Gina Torres, Katee Sackhoff, or Claudia Black, I could die happy...)
But enough of that. On to the Ten Reasons to Drool Over Jensen Ackles...
1. You Can Play Connect-the-Dots With His Freckles
2. He Sings
Guys who sing are hot. It's just a fact of life.
Especially guys who sing well, which he reportedly does.
The following video was taken by a fan at the Asylum Convention in England in 2007. Jensen's friend Jason Manns gave a concert there, and Jensen sang backup for "Crazy Love." Jason has since persuaded Jensen to record a version of the song together, which can be heard (and downloaded) on Jason's Myspace page. (Crazy Love JJ)
3. He's a Scruffmuffin
4. ... But He Cleans Up Well
5. He's a Closet Dork
And sometimes not-so-closet. Supernatural co-star Jared Padalecki is especially good at bringing the goofball out in Jensen.
6. He Makes Bow-Legs Look Hot
Sometimes, photographers try to hide the fact that he has bow-legs, but we fans know better. Own 'em, Jensen. Bowlegs are adorable!
7. He Rides ... Ponies
Well, horses actually, but Supernatural costar Jared Padalecki, who is 6'4", calls them ponies and ponies is more fun.
There's just something about a guy who rides horses. Maybe it's my own horsiness coming out, but at the very least, any guy who's good with horses is gonna have great hands and a voice like, well, like Jensen's, for example. Deep and soothing. Yummy.
The following video is a very early interview, from Jensen's days on Days of Our Lives. I don't ride Western or even follow it very closely, but in my inexpert opinion, Jensen shows good balance, but should probably ease up a bit on the horse's mouth. Obviously, it's impossible to say how much of that was at the request of the cameraman, though. A hundred years after Black Beauty, non-horsey people still like to see a horse's head up and champing at the bit.
For those of you who don't want to spend the whole interview analyzing Jensen's riding technique (chances are, most of you), there are some lovely shots of Jensen's ridiculously long eyelashes. (Life is so not fair.)
8. His Lips Are X-Rated
I'm not going to go into any great detail about this, 'cause there are better things to do.
Like look at them.
We can keep going here for, ah, quite a long time, but I guess we'll call it quits for now. Just one more, 'cause we can't talk about his lips without digging up at least one picture of the famous "ducky lips."
Okay, fine we lied. Two more.
It's not our fault Dean has an oral fixation.
9. You Can Fit His Ass on Your Graphing Calculator
...and some have.
It is y=-(sin(x^(1.7/6)+4)+(1/x))+10, to be precise.
10. He Can Actually Act
And in the end, this is what it really comes down to. In Hollywood, hot guys are a dime a dozen. If you watch enough TV and movies (or even relatively little, like me), you get almost blind to them, because everybody's beautiful. Your eyes register the pretty face, but if that's all it is, you forget about it almost as soon as it's offscreen.
In order to be remembered, you need to be more than just a freak genetic accident that happens to produce perfect cheekbones, a chiselled jaw, and a long-lashed pair of pretty green eyes. And Jensen is. His charisma pretty much oozes from the screen, whatever his role, and he's got talent too. I'd be the first to admit that his roles have not always had the highest quality writing that money can buy, but his talent has been able to turn some really banal and sometimes outright crappy lines into something that means more.
And when the writing has been good, well. Supernatural's writers are not perfect - their handling of exposition in particular sometimes makes me want to beat my head against a wall - but one thing they do really, really well is family dynamics, and Jensen has absolutely shone in his role as Dean, the "good son" of the Winchester family who, despite his wisecracking bravado and penchant for muscle cars, mullet rock, and women, acted practically as a surrogate wife for his revenge obsessed father after his mother was killed, and raised his younger brother almost entirely on his own starting from the age of four.
Gorgeous, charismatic, and talented. Some people have all the luck.
We wish you all the best, Jensen, and thank you for your role in bringing Dean and Alec and Jason and CJ and Eric and everybody else to life.